This is by far my favourite song at the moment; “Blessing’s” by Laura Story , I believe the trials of this life are His mercies in disguise, I have doubted His goodness, I have doubted His love and many times after I have shared my journey with others, they are perplexed that I choose to glorify God. They have questioned how can I still believe in God let alone trust in His goodness? They perceive that when I was trusting in Him, He let me down?!
I have grappled in my mind with these arguments for the past 5 years, ‘is God good? Does He love me? Why do bad things happen to good people?, in fact why do bad things happen at all? Finally I grew tired of trying to figure it all out and made the choice to trust in His Word and trust that He is a God of Mercy and deep, deep Love for us. My healing has come through tears and a thousand sleepless nights were what it took to know He is near, my faith has been renewed and I have entered His rest.
I still have painful memories and even present day sorrowful situations, but I am learning to transcend them by pursuing the heart of God in prayer and reading the Word. Proverbs 3:5-6 implores us to, “Trust in the Lord with all your heart, And lean not on your own understanding;6 In all your ways acknowledge Him, And He shall direct your paths”. Day and night I have meditated on this truth. Trusting in the Lord means, rather than blaming Him for what happens, rather than doubting His love for us, we relax and rest assured believe that our Heavenly Father has our life in the palm of His hand and never shall He loosen His grip, no never. x
Jesus says, ‘… In the world you will have tribulation; but be of good cheer, I have overcome the world.” John 16:33 (NKJV)
Jesus knew well in advance that this life would be full of trouble, He has not promised when you believe in Him your life will be trouble-free, He has promised though that no matter what you face He will never leave you nor forsake you.
Trust me, when I gave my heart to Jesus there were no bolts of lightning tracking through the sky, the devil didn’t send me a congratulations card and wipe me off his list, what did happen though was a deep peace moved into my spirit.
Peace like no other, to this day has been my anchor in the storms. I am almost certain, had I not been anchored in Him throughout the past few years, I quite possibly would have ended my life. In His Grace, Mercy and immeasurable love I have been made whole, complete in Him.
Whatever storms you may be going through stand fast, let the winds blow and when things settle you will look back and see His Sovereign hand has drawn a line of purpose through that which you thought you would never survive.
They looked… and behold, the glory of the Lord appeared in the cloud (Exod. 16:10)
For the most part of this year I feel the skies within my soul have been amass with grey clouds, even on the clear bright sunny days my heart would beat anxiously at the thought of another impending storm. April has come and I do believe the winds of change have blown the grey storm clouds afar from me, yes the days ahead are bright. In the natural, nothing much has changed, what has changed is where I am placing my focus, choosing to rejoice in spite of what life’s storms may bring!
Get into the habit of looking for the silver lining of the cloud, and when you have found it, continue to look at it rather than at the leaden gray in the middle.
Do not yield to discouragement no matter how sorely pressed or beset you may be. A discouraged soul is helpless. He can neither resist the wiles of the enemy himself, while in this state, nor can he prevail in prayer for others…. We must keep faith, we must keep hope, we must keep courage, we must keep Christ. We would better creep away from the battlefield at once if we are not going to be brave. There is no time for the soul to stampede. Keep the skyward look, my soul; keep the skyward look!
(excerpt from Streams in the Desert by Charles E. Cowman)
As I continue to share my testimony of healing from depression, many readers are being inspired, filled with hope and completely healed. I believe God is healing in many ways as we share life’s journey together, in particular when we give testimony of what He has done in our lives.
May I encourage you, as you read these postsbe open to His presence. In His presence you may feel you want to laugh, cry, or get up and dance around. Whatever the case, whatever happens be rest assured the Lord is doing a great and mighty work in you. It’s all about Him, He wants you healed & whole more than you want it… I don’t know what His manifest Presence is going to look like for you, but I know my Jesus so be expectant!
Let me remind you of the power of testimony and how by sharing a testimony (or by you reading or hearing a testimony) we are shifting the atmosphere, literally inviting the Father to ‘do it again’!
In Revelation 19:10 we read ‘the testimony of Jesus is the spirit of prophecy’.
… the ‘testimony, a spoken or written record of anything God has done, is the spirit of prophecy.
Prophecy either points to the future or it changes an immediate event.
Testimony causes a change in present events! The word ‘testimony’ in Hebrew comes from a root word which means ‘do again’ … so every time a testimony is spoken, it comes with it God’s covenant to repeat the miracle!
The reason we share a testimony is because we want to create the atmosphere for the miracle to be duplicated… as I share my journey on these pages I am not just giving information, I am giving the power for transformation, lives are transformed as faith is elevated through the power of our testimony.
I will testify of His goodness all of my days 🙂 Now you go find some powerful testimonies in areas that you need breakthrough, let faith arise and BE EXPECTANT x
‘Here Am I, send me’ (Isaiah 6) has been my heart cry for the past three years but some day’s I want to quit., I want to walk away. When we find ourselves in the middle of the desert or valley in pursuit of God’s calling, we can begin to question whether our dreams are actually God-inspired… nevertheless we must keep moving forward and remind ourselves of the Promises God has spoken over us. Today may you be encouraged to sing to the Lord ‘You can send me, I’ll take your message to the world’… send me
May this beautiful song inspire you “Here Am I, Send Me”
Often people will ask me what is the significance of my cover design (book yet to be finished). For me, the cover had to be intriguing and have meaning, it was important that the imagery would somehow speak to women young and old in an encouraging tone that says ‘ lift up your weary head, let hope arise and be strengthened by the true knowledge that you are beautiful and courageous’.
The crumpled note being pinned to the wall represents a return to believing the truth about yourself, and consequently a return to happiness. Crumpling of the note is symbolic of what we do with our self belief as life wears us down. As a toddler the words of beauty and courage are written on our hearts we believe we truly are the centre of the universe, our beauty is affirmed by doting adults and we are fearless (except the odd monster under the bed tends to be a bit scary). My little 3 year old little girl believes without doubt she is pretty and perfect in every way, no fear of being too fat or too thin, no fear of what other people think etc… she is free to be a beautiful, courageous little girl.
Sadly, over the years what we believe about ourselves, becomes distorted and fashioned by the influences around us, and this is when we ‘crumple the note’, so to speak, and throw it in the waste paper basket. We gradually lose our 3yo perspective of how amazing, “fearfully and wonderfully made” we truly are. From an early age seeds of doubt and fear take root in our minds as we become aware of judgement from others, cave into peer pressure, and aspire to be just like the false images of airbrushed models. Doubt and fear grow like relentless weeds suffocating all that is true about the beautiful, courageous you. May your journey through this blog (and the book) encourage you to go back to the crumpled note, a note that speaks of your true identity and worth, write out the TRUTH, stick it up on the wall and believe it.
May 2014 be the year that you pursue the real you, the amazing you, the ‘cannot be replaced’ you with reckless abandon. X
Amidst life’s storms, I recently started to feel like God is ‘holding out’ on me, nothing I pray & nothing I do seems to be working towards changing our circumstances. My breath prayer (even in my sleep) has been ‘I lean not on my own understanding, my life is in the hands of the Maker of Heaven’. My patience & trust levels were at an all time low when I came across the following teaching from Bobby Conner, this brought peace and a profound ability to endure this season of seemingly nothing happening. God is at work behind the scenes & I want to encourage you to do all you can and then simply stand! Enjoy Bobby’s wisdom here…
Are you feeling frustrated and impatient that your prayers have not yet come to pass? Discern that those are the enemy’s accusations sent to discourage you from standing firm.
Worry, anxiety, lethargy, bitterness, pride, frustration, envy, impatience – anything that is not in harmony with righteousness, peace, joy, love, patience, goodness, kindness and self-control is falling prey to the enemy’s tactics.
Be angry – but do not sin in that anger.
Fear and tremble – but fear God only, with a contrite heart.Continue reading →
During my journey of recovery from depression, I would often reflect on the story of Elijah written in the book of 1 Kings. Here we read the how this great man of God was running away to hide from Jezebel:
“ But he himself went a day’s journey into the wilderness, and came and sat down under a broom tree. And he prayed that he might die, and said, “It is enough! Now, Lord, take my life, for I am no better than my fathers!” (see 19: 3-5)
It is clear from the context that Elijah was exhausted – mentally and physically. I believe he had not been eating or resting, that he was running on a spiritual high (sound familiar?)
Elijah had great victories, revived a widow’s son, called down fire from heaven and then finds himself running scared from a girl! This irrational response is not too dissimilar to the first signs of depression, as his body was exhausted so to his mind became irrational, ‘Lord take my life’ is suicidal thinking!. He had already stood against greater odds than one woman and yet he was fearful and perceived the threat irrationally.
How did God respond to Elijah? He cared for his natural needs: “Then as he lay and slept under a broom tree, suddenly an angel touched him, and said to him, “Arise and eat.” Then he looked, and there by his head was a cake baked on coals, and a jar of water. So he ate and drank, and lay down again.And the angel of the Lord came back the second time, and touched him, and said, “Arise and eat, because the journey is too great for you.” So he arose, and ate and drank; and he went in the strength of that food forty days and forty nights as far as Horeb, the mountain of God.” (see 1 Kings 19:5-8)
The primary need that the Lord saw was the need for the body to recover strength: to sleep, to eat, to drink. Elijah had a nature – a human nature, just like our own. Therefore, if exhaustion and lack of nutrition can cause Elijah to have a flat day, then it can happen to us because we have the same nature, a human nature that requires adequate rest and nourishment.
When our body is depleted, our soul will follow with irrational thoughts, anger, irritability, insomnia etc., and of course depression which, by consequence, we will feel spiritually depleted. The same connection is true in a vice versa situation, for example what we allow our thought life to meditate on will determine our emotional condition and ultimately affect our physical bodies. Randy Clark writes; “When our will reflects His, our emotions receive the best medicine possible. An alignment takes place that gives permission for the body to experience health. A healthy spirit makes for a healthy soul. A healthy soul makes it much more likely that we will enjoy physical health too.” ”. (The Essential Guide to Healing pg, 179)
Often, we fail to recognise a ‘misalignment’ between our body, soul and spirit, as life gets busier we can fall into the trap of neglecting our physical needs, as Elijah did, we fall into an emotional demise and then find ourselves asking ‘how did I get here’? Today, take a moment to consider areas that are misaligned in your life… maybe it’s a check on your thoughts? What are you meditating on? How’s your nutrition? Do you have healthy boundaries in place with regards to negative influences? Self care is not selfish… it is essential, so, like Elijah, you may go ” in the strength of that food forty days and forty nights…” x
“You will not have to fight this battle. Take up your positions; stand firm and see the deliverance the LORD will give you, Judah and Jerusalem. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged. Go out to face them tomorrow, and the LORD will be with you.'” 2 Chronicles 20:17
Beautiful, Courageous You 