In recent times I have come across many people that are busy with performance, busy with measuring up to the worlds plumb line of success, busy people pleasing, wearing ‘busy’ like a badge, like it’s a status to be coveted. In prayer and pondering I asked the Lord to speak to me about this busyness… should I be more busy so as to soak in the success pool? Here’s what I believe He whispered; ‘they keep themselves ‘purposely busy’ while I have created you to be ‘busy about your purpose’, your purpose is to love and be loved, Kingdom success is measured by how well you love’. This brought such a peace to my soul, and reminded me of the words penned by Paul in 1 Corinthians 13;
The Way of Love
If I speak with human eloquence and angelic ecstasy but don’t love, I’m nothing but the creaking of a rusty gate.
If I speak God’s Word with power, revealing all his mysteries and making everything plain as day, and if I have faith that says to a mountain, “Jump,” and it jumps, but I don’t love, I’m nothing.
If I give everything I own to the poor and even go to the stake to be burned as a martyr, but I don’t love, I’ve gotten nowhere. So, no matter what I say, what I believe, and what I do, I’m bankrupt without love. (MSG Version)
Lately it’s been on my heart to share an excerpt from my book, may you be encouraged that no matter how tough life gets there is ALWAYS Hope… always x
Overwhelmed with fear and alone I found myself calling on God, my God the God I had abandoned, the God I didn’t need. All the while I had been trying to do life my way, He was there waiting for me to come running back into His arms, all of my effort and strength was gone all I had left was to surrender to the hope that I once knew. Hope in God was buried deep within my spirit, early years of Sunday school had planted seeds of hope that somehow, someway there was a divine meaning to my life. As I turned my thoughts back to God, I cried out to the unseen, somehow I knew He was in the room with me as a profound peace swept over my being.
My broken heart carried a pain so deep that I could hardly breathe, still in grief from my father’s death, in shock from the promiscuity of *Jake and now I lay waiting, hoping for a miracle… the survival of my twin babies. Somehow that night my hurt collided with the healing power of Jesus, I felt simultaneously weak but strong. The apostle Paul tells of the strength he found in Christ “It was a case of Christ’s strength moving in on my weakness. Now I take limitations in stride, and with good cheer, these limitations that cut me down to size—abuse, accidents, opposition, bad breaks. I just let Christ take over! And so the weaker I get, the stronger I become.” 2 Corinthians 12:7-10 (MSG)
Letting Christ take over is hard for most of us, for me there was no other choice I had reached rock bottom with no options but to surrender my will to His. Often in a sorrowful situation we shout accusations at God and then turn and walk away, I have learned by my past to not shout at God but instead it is best that we stop and listen.
Amid the calamity, a monitor strapped around my stomach, intravenous drip and observations by the nurse every hour, I managed to drift into a peaceful sleep a peace which truly surpassed my understanding. I awoke early to the gentle nudge of the obstetrician on duty, before I could clear the sleep from my eyes he began, “good morning, we are making plans for you to be taken to a larger hospital that specialises in pre-term labour, it is the safest place to be should your twins decide to come early”. Within the hour I was in the ambulance and being taken to Rockhampton hospital, alone and uncertain of how the following days would unfold the long drive in the ambulance ushered in the opportunity for my thoughts to begin to race and before long my peace had turned to dread.
Immediately upon arrival I was taken for an ultrasound to check on the twins, a cold stone-faced radiologist performed the ultrasound without a word spoken to me. All I recall is thinking “God where are you in all this, it’s all my fault this is my punishment for turning away from you”, why would He want to answer my prayers? I was convinced that God was angry with me. Finally, the radiologist broke his silence; “we can’t do anything for you, one baby is very sick and will possibly die in the next couple of days and then the other will have a chance of survival, you need to be taken to Brisbane”. His words were like missiles flying off his tongue and straight into my heart, no warmth or empathy just very matter of fact. The hours went by very slowly that day, as I lay and wait for the next report on when and how I would be leaving, the same incomprehensible peace washed over me.
This is by far my favourite song at the moment; “Blessing’s” by Laura Story , I believe the trials of this life are His mercies in disguise, I have doubted His goodness, I have doubted His love and many times after I have shared my journey with others, they are perplexed that I choose to glorify God. They have questioned how can I still believe in God let alone trust in His goodness? They perceive that when I was trusting in Him, He let me down?!
I have grappled in my mind with these arguments for the past 5 years, ‘is God good? Does He love me? Why do bad things happen to good people?, in fact why do bad things happen at all? Finally I grew tired of trying to figure it all out and made the choice to trust in His Word and trust that He is a God of Mercy and deep, deep Love for us. My healing has come through tears and a thousand sleepless nights were what it took to know He is near, my faith has been renewed and I have entered His rest.
I still have painful memories and even present day sorrowful situations, but I am learning to transcend them by pursuing the heart of God in prayer and reading the Word. Proverbs 3:5-6 implores us to, “Trust in the Lord with all your heart, And lean not on your own understanding;6 In all your ways acknowledge Him, And He shall direct your paths”. Day and night I have meditated on this truth. Trusting in the Lord means, rather than blaming Him for what happens, rather than doubting His love for us, we relax and rest assured believe that our Heavenly Father has our life in the palm of His hand and never shall He loosen His grip, no never. x
Jesus says, ‘… In the world you will have tribulation; but be of good cheer, I have overcome the world.” John 16:33 (NKJV)
Jesus knew well in advance that this life would be full of trouble, He has not promised when you believe in Him your life will be trouble-free, He has promised though that no matter what you face He will never leave you nor forsake you.
Trust me, when I gave my heart to Jesus there were no bolts of lightning tracking through the sky, the devil didn’t send me a congratulations card and wipe me off his list, what did happen though was a deep peace moved into my spirit.
Peace like no other, to this day has been my anchor in the storms. I am almost certain, had I not been anchored in Him throughout the past few years, I quite possibly would have ended my life. In His Grace, Mercy and immeasurable love I have been made whole, complete in Him.
Whatever storms you may be going through stand fast, let the winds blow and when things settle you will look back and see His Sovereign hand has drawn a line of purpose through that which you thought you would never survive.
For years I ran from you, you called my name and I pretended not to hear. Everything wrong in my life & everything wrong with the world… I blamed you for it all. Now I understand when I thought you were absent that’s when you were most near and caught me every time I would fall.
You love me because you love me, all you’ve ever wanted was my love!
Ahhh what a love…
YOU are created to be loved, that’s why He calls you His Beloved 🙂 in fact your number one duty is to BE loved x
Often times when I begin to get caught up with thoughts of ‘why me?’ and I lose perspective, per se. I am reminded of my blind father and his ability to press on and persevere in spite of his afflictions. I have wonderful eyesight, what a great blessing!
Helen Keller overcame the adversity of losing sight and hearing at age two, although faced with unthinkable circumstances, Keller counted each day as blessed, she once said “The best and most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or even touched – they must be felt with the heart”.
When we read what the apostle Paul wrote in the book of Philippians it becomes clear that our perspective on life will determine our level of contentment. Paul wrote from a jail cell;
“I’m glad in God, far happier than you would ever guess—happy that you’re again showing such strong concern for me. Not that you ever quit praying and thinking about me. You just had no chance to show it. Actually, I don’t have a sense of needing anything personally. I’ve learned by now to be quite content whatever my circumstances. I’m just as happy with little as with much, with much as with little. I’ve found the recipe for being happy whether full or hungry, hands full or hands empty. Whatever I have, wherever I am, I can make it through anything in the One who makes me who I am”. Philippians 4:12 (MSG)
It’s so easy to get stuck in the ‘why me ‘trap, believe me I know.
In recent years, ‘why me’? has been the mantra of my life that was, until I realised, ‘hey why not me’? When we develop the ability to look at the tough times from a new position, we can embrace life as a journey of valley’s and mountaintops, all of which God draws a line of purpose through the centre of it all. Today, whether you find yourself in a valley, or upon a mountaintop, be encouraged…
“Keep your eyes on Jesus, who both began and finished this race we’re in. Study how he did it. Because he never lost sight of where he was headed—that exhilarating finish in and with God—he could put up with anything along the way…” Hebrews 12:2 (MSG Version)
The word ‘excellence’ would have to be one of my favourite words! I love the way a word can change your mindset, lift your Spirit and motivate you towards even greater exploits . Words have power… we can speak life or death into a person with the words we choose. That’s why I love the word ‘excellence’, to say something is of excellence is to see the value and treasure hidden within. Long ago I resolved to speak life into every person, every situation and circumstance so I am thrilled to be nominated for the Excellence Award by Eric http://hunt4truth.wordpress.com/ so that now I have yet another opportunity to ‘call out the treasure’ and declare ‘excellence’ over the following blogs.
Passion creates freedom regardless of circumstance, for example; when I was in depression my will every morning was to stay in bed and literally curl up to die, however when I made the choice to get passionate about being well again I began to challenge my ‘will to stay in bed’… remaining a prisoner to my thoughts.
I recall asking myself “what action would I take if I didn’t have these thoughts?’ my answer ‘I’d put on my shoes and get out for a run’ well, revelation hit me like a tonne of bricks! In that moment I had realised regardless of how I was feeling, regardless of my circumstances, there was freedom to be found in the simple act of putting on my running shoes. I determined to challenge my depressed will, dragged myself out of bed, put my joggers on and went for a run.
I cried every step of the way, a mix of emotions swung like a pendulum, sad with grief one moment then overwhelmed with joy the next. I remember running out amongst the hills where we live, I made my way down a dirt track toward a herd of brown cows. Before my season of depression, I would take a daily run on the same route, the cow paddock was my 20 min turnaround point. Often I would stop at the cows and enjoy the simplicity of chewing the cud and just being what they were created to be, no striving, just being. This run was different, it was almost as though I had found a long lost friend, a friend whom I was convinced would never return… I had found me! When I reached the cow paddock I stood and watched for awhile all at once I felt ‘normal’, even a bubble of joy in my spirit, in that moment, I cried out to the cows ‘I am back’!.
There’s something powerful about rejoicing in the midst of problems, by the simple act of doing what previously (before depression) would make me feel good, something in the atmosphere of my depressed state began to shift. Joy is a powerful weapon, despite how you may be feeling start to take steps to partake in things that use to make you feel good. Once I had decided to make it my passion to get well I continued to take action by choosing to get into life as I knew it. Gradually the depression lifted I began to experience hours, days and eventually weeks of feeling happy. Often times I would be overwhelmed with thoughts of giving up, ‘joy will never be mine it just won’t last’ then the Holy Spirit would bring to mind the story in Luke 17:12 there were ten lepers crying out to Jesus ‘have mercy on us’. “So when He saw them, He said to them, “Go, show yourselves to the priests.” And so it was that as they went, they were cleansed.” Vs 14 (NKJV) Healed as they went!
Belligerent faith must become the very essence of who you are, passionate to be well, eager to fight for complete healing and restoration even when nothing much seems to have changed. Just like the ten lepers, you will be healed as you ‘go’, go out and engage in life, go to read your Bible, go run – go!
Beautiful, Courageous You 